Friday, October 10, 2008

You know you go to SPU when...

This is a collaborative effort of Eva and I. And it's all factual. Everything on here has either specifically happened, or happens on a regular basis.

You know you go to SPU when...
-you know three or more people who wear fanny packs

-30% of the girls on your floor swing dance. regulaly.

-you're taken off-guard when you see one of the 4 black students roaming campus

-more people wear UW sweatshirts

-you dress up to go to Gwinn

-"Thats a penis on the clock tower?? EW!!"

-the most popular kids are the ones on hall counsel

-you don't know who Snoop Dogg is

-there are more republicans than democrats

-you write "fuck" on your personal hall white board, come back an hour later and it says "fiddlesticks"

-you've parked your car in moyer spot 3 and suffered the consequences

-the cool guys are the ones giving purity talks

-at least 3 people on your flor brought Veggie Tales movies or CDs

-you're excitd to get an engagement ring and you're only a freshman

-you know who Phil-Dog is

-you're excited to "engage the culture" but rarely step foot off campus

-there's outrage over a planned parenthood ad in the school paper

-there are more than 3 Beths on your floor

-PerezHilton.com is blocked from all campus computers because of adult content

-going to group is the most social part of your week

-the best way to talk to the opposite sex: "Man can you believe all the HW from our scriptures class??

-you're REQUIRED to take a scriptures class

-the juciest gossip is about what Pastor Mark Driscol said on Sunday

-your UNIVERSITY won't allow a gay straight alliance club

-Playboy is illegal contraban anywhere on campus

-in the event of a rare informational sex-forum, girls and boys must be separated

-a common question at these forums:"Can a girl get pregnant if she doesnt have an orgasm?"

-The on-campus keggers involved drinking a lot of rootbeer

-you go to soccer games instead of football games

-you're not sure if your school even does anything for homecoming

-your school arranges a speed-dating event to help you find a mate

-Profs dont talk much about that liberal evolution theory

-you think sexuality is a sin

-you think Spirit 105.3 has the best morning show

-you're excited to have 4 boys in your class

-at dances, girls dance separately from the boys, who are dancing stupidly in a cirlce with eachother

-you're offended by this list

Saturday, October 4, 2008

A Peace Offering! (last blog, cont.)

Update! After initially feeling fearful and suspicious of who this mystery girl was..I started to feel a bit guilty. I don't want to make enemies but I seem to go out of my way to do so. And i dont want to be like that so assuming this person will see my board again, I wrote a note to her.
Something like, "Yes, I did it and im sorry. I shouldnt have. But youve got to understand my frustration, it happens almost every day! BUT im sorry. I wont be doing it again. "
The next night, Eva and I went to blockbuster to rent Sex and the City. It was dark and rainy, around 7 and we drive back and park. No one in my spot! Amazing! We walk down the parking aisle to reach the stairs back down the the dorm and i see it! Lying face up in one of the nearby spaces, my SIGN! EEE!
I take that as a sign this girl read my message, perhaps understood..and gave a peace offering! Or at least, a trusted "no further maliciousness" offering. Yay!
When I got back to the room I erased the last message and wrote "thanks :) again, im sorry"
Finally some sort of resolution and happy ending for an SPU saga. And i learned a lesson! Woo

Friday, October 3, 2008

making enemies 101

Okay so not even a week into SPU dorm life I've already created drama. And I'm not one to create drama! Make no mistake, I talk shit, but that shit doesn't get out. It's just my own grumblings to vent frustrations.
To give some background on this story, you must know the parking issues I endured all of last year. I pay 55$ a quarter to park my car in the resident ( read: conveniant) parking lot closest to the dorm. My spot was one of the best and bitches were always stealing it! There are signs that say, "RESIDENT LOT". The Commuter lot is two levels up, but who wants to walk down stairs to get to their class?? So park in a reserved space. And by the way, all the spaces on this reserved, resident level have numbers painted on them. Any dumbass could reason that if a spot has a number painted on it, it's probably ALOTTED to someone. But no, every time I'd leave my spot, come back, there'd be a car there. Up to 5 times a week. And I'm not gonna continue the cycle and park in someone else's reserved spot, so i go allthe way up to commuter parking and walk down.
So the year gets off to a bad start and of course, there's someone in my spot after I'm gone for two hours. I'm enraged. I knew this would happen over the summer so i bought car paint to write on their window. I wrote a little sum sum on their window and left a naughty note that may have had expletives. Next, in hysterics, I call the safety and security dept. and demand to talk to whoever is in charge. I'd already gotten terribye lost and stranded that day, so I was emotionally volatile and broke down in tears while talking/venting to the parking person. SOMETHING NEEDS TO BE DONE. I AM BEING IGNORED!!!.
I was told that the guy who was supposed to paint "RESERVED" on each space to make it more obvious DIED over the summer. M response, "Thats sad but...well, theres other people in this world who do painting.." They can only resolve to move me to a less popular spot. I accept.
Later, same day, I Go to work, return, planning on parking in my new, less popular spot, and yes! a foreign car!! AHHH I lose it and again write a nasty note, and scribble lines on the car's window.
Next day, I get an email from the safety and security guy I talked to before, wishing to meet with me to disuss my parking issues. We meet, I tell him last years saga and the most recent issues, and he seems to be on my side. He asks me if i remember what kind of car it was that was parked in my original spot. I didnt remember the make/model, all i recalled for sure that it was teal. And he looks at me weird and he's like, yes, it was. They reported a note..
And I confess.
"And..anything else...?
"...and i wrote a message on their car with car paint.."
He's cool about it, Like, he understands my frustration but tells me i cant be doing that. okay. SO i have to write a release for them, stating what i did and issuing an apology. I do. and i'll be meeting with my RLC about it soon.
BUT! soo not the end of the story!
My ex-roomie amber bought me a sign that said, "NO PARKING" big, bold, red. cant miss it sign. i put it up on the wall in front of my new spot the next day. left for work. come back. SIGN IS GONE. Bitch!
I'm angry of course! That was a gift! I put it up 6 hours ago. I look around at the other cars in their windows for my sign...no luck.
I go back to the room, upset, and make a crucial mistake.
On my whiteboard outside my room, I write, "Some bitch stole my parking sign!"
No harm right? I just want people to know why i may be grumpy.
I go eat, library, come back into the room. Say hi to Eva, my roommate, and leave the room.
Then! I see the whiteboard. Under my message about someone stealing my sign, i read: Yeah, that was me. Thanks for vandalizing my car" what!!
Shit son. So that makes me believe it was someone on my own dorm floor! And they now know who i am! They know I'M the one who left a nasty note and paint (washable!) on their car. They know where I sleep! I show Eva and she's like shoot, i'm locking the door all the time now!
So I'm kind of frazzled! Really on guard, looking around like it could be anyone. It could be the girl I'm brushing my teeth next to. Shit I dont even want anyone to SEE me brushing my teeth now cuz they know which shower caddy in the bathroom is mine. When I'm not around they're probably scrubbing the toilets with my toothbrush.
So thats the terribly long story. I gave myself away... i HATE that they know who I am, but I dont know who they are! I keep thinking I'll have this horror movie moment, like pop into one of the girl rooms to say hi and chat, sit down..and I'll see it. My stolen sign poking out from under the bed. In my head i'll be like OMG its HER! Get out NOW!